O.K. now that I think about it I think the word itself is off track. I don't know about you but for me the word "ascension" makes me think of lift off, going somewhere, rising. I deeply appreciate how much great information I have received since I first learned about and began following ascension post. Yet I now think I also led myself astray. For me the better word is awakening, as from a dream. That fits for me.
There was one set of post I occasionally followed as I received some good information yet I often found it too far out. They are the ones who, from my point of view, are hung up on what they call disclosure. Disclosure is the idea that we are visited by beings from other galaxies and the government knows and isn't telling us. So they are waiting for the secret to be revealed. Could be. Who knows? I wouldn't be surprised. Yet they were hanging their hats on this and keep bumming when it doesn't happen. Now for me that is a bit silly yet I realize I was doing something a bit similar waiting for something outside of me to wake me up. Yes, I know definitely that unseen guides are nudging me, prodding me, tickling me. Yet on 12/21 I semi unconsciously expected a few trumpet blares and a harp or two to push me more or less awake. My mistaken belief was that I was asleep and needed something beyond me to wake me up. Asleep yes, needing help yes, anyone can finally do it for me, no.
The fact is I need only one thing here, to remember. What does that mean? It is a question of believing a false identity, that I am limited, that I an be separate from love, that I am alone. All not true yet I buy it again and again albeit in ever more subtle ways. I have healed most of the blaring instances of separation yet still believe more subtle version of the basic lie. So it is is a question of a shift of perception, of awareness, of knowing. It isn't a location to get to, it is an inner truth that has not yet been fully realized. The glimpses are so tantalizing I know I must proceed.
I believe a rebirth has ocured. Yet, as others are writing, I sense we are in a void space, not here nor there. I remember right after my daughter was born. I loved her beyond anything I had ever known yet I was adjusting to major changes in my lifestyle and there were moments of exhaustion where I knew despair and doubt. Although I had not given physical birth, the adjustment period was choppy initially. My sense is that is what is occurring here. We don't have a physical baby to coo over so it is even more subtle and requires much greater faith to believe anything significant has transpired. I remember thinking 11/11/11 was a bust until I witnessed the faint changes blossoming into huge shifts. It took me awhile to recognize.
Seeing some people disappointment about not lifting somewhere new or having alien spacecraft revealed helped me wake up to my equally off base assumptions. Perhaps it is no coincidence that I have been sleeping very soundly and long most nights. The wake up is more gradual than I would have preferred so maybe I'll just go take a nap.
BINGO: synchronicity alert
I just finished writing the above and went to check email and found this blog from, Jayem, scribe for the Way of Mastery.
http://wayofmastery.com/jayem/blog/index.1.html (have to click two links to reach it)
He quotes chapter 5 of the Way of the Heart section of the book, the very same section I opened to this morning with my questions about what ascension is and is not. I felt a lifting as I had read how desire, intention, surrender and allowing are the keys to the kingdom and bring us home. I felt clarity begin to emerge. Then to see Jayem's post an hour or so later on the same material was a huge ahha moment, as Oprah would say. I felt a literally recognition of BINGO!! I am right on target. A wave of some dross lifted off of me. Ah, yes, unseen guides always clearing the way for us. I feel called to share some other mini miracles that show me how easy the path is when we truly surender and get out of the way.
- My coach tells me to eat red meat occasionally and a day later I receive a large package of frozen meat for the previous owner of this house. I call the company to return it and they tell me to keep it as they can not take perishables back!
- I am flipping myself out trying to resolve a major challenge with my car that was very damaged in a storm. I surrender the drama and an hour later two people hand me a solution.
- I am trying to make a decision to spend money for something very symbolic and meaningful to me but pricey and feels a bit out of reach and I find a forgotten check on my bedside table. I share with a friend how spending that amount of money would be such a leap of faith and I then read a blog with the words leap of faith in them. I literally never remember reading those words in print before.
- Several plans go kafluey and I start to get bent out of shape but finally surrender. They later turn out much better than I had initially planned.
- I think to myself I'd like another joy mug and the next day at water aerobics my teacher decides to have us race across the pool and give a prize to the winner, me, a mug with joy written on it.
You get the picture. Surrender use to be a dirty word for me. Now it is the answer to my prayers.
There was one set of post I occasionally followed as I received some good information yet I often found it too far out. They are the ones who, from my point of view, are hung up on what they call disclosure. Disclosure is the idea that we are visited by beings from other galaxies and the government knows and isn't telling us. So they are waiting for the secret to be revealed. Could be. Who knows? I wouldn't be surprised. Yet they were hanging their hats on this and keep bumming when it doesn't happen. Now for me that is a bit silly yet I realize I was doing something a bit similar waiting for something outside of me to wake me up. Yes, I know definitely that unseen guides are nudging me, prodding me, tickling me. Yet on 12/21 I semi unconsciously expected a few trumpet blares and a harp or two to push me more or less awake. My mistaken belief was that I was asleep and needed something beyond me to wake me up. Asleep yes, needing help yes, anyone can finally do it for me, no.
The fact is I need only one thing here, to remember. What does that mean? It is a question of believing a false identity, that I am limited, that I an be separate from love, that I am alone. All not true yet I buy it again and again albeit in ever more subtle ways. I have healed most of the blaring instances of separation yet still believe more subtle version of the basic lie. So it is is a question of a shift of perception, of awareness, of knowing. It isn't a location to get to, it is an inner truth that has not yet been fully realized. The glimpses are so tantalizing I know I must proceed.
I believe a rebirth has ocured. Yet, as others are writing, I sense we are in a void space, not here nor there. I remember right after my daughter was born. I loved her beyond anything I had ever known yet I was adjusting to major changes in my lifestyle and there were moments of exhaustion where I knew despair and doubt. Although I had not given physical birth, the adjustment period was choppy initially. My sense is that is what is occurring here. We don't have a physical baby to coo over so it is even more subtle and requires much greater faith to believe anything significant has transpired. I remember thinking 11/11/11 was a bust until I witnessed the faint changes blossoming into huge shifts. It took me awhile to recognize.
Seeing some people disappointment about not lifting somewhere new or having alien spacecraft revealed helped me wake up to my equally off base assumptions. Perhaps it is no coincidence that I have been sleeping very soundly and long most nights. The wake up is more gradual than I would have preferred so maybe I'll just go take a nap.
BINGO: synchronicity alert
I just finished writing the above and went to check email and found this blog from, Jayem, scribe for the Way of Mastery.
http://wayofmastery.com/jayem/blog/index.1.html (have to click two links to reach it)
He quotes chapter 5 of the Way of the Heart section of the book, the very same section I opened to this morning with my questions about what ascension is and is not. I felt a lifting as I had read how desire, intention, surrender and allowing are the keys to the kingdom and bring us home. I felt clarity begin to emerge. Then to see Jayem's post an hour or so later on the same material was a huge ahha moment, as Oprah would say. I felt a literally recognition of BINGO!! I am right on target. A wave of some dross lifted off of me. Ah, yes, unseen guides always clearing the way for us. I feel called to share some other mini miracles that show me how easy the path is when we truly surender and get out of the way.
- My coach tells me to eat red meat occasionally and a day later I receive a large package of frozen meat for the previous owner of this house. I call the company to return it and they tell me to keep it as they can not take perishables back!
- I am flipping myself out trying to resolve a major challenge with my car that was very damaged in a storm. I surrender the drama and an hour later two people hand me a solution.
- I am trying to make a decision to spend money for something very symbolic and meaningful to me but pricey and feels a bit out of reach and I find a forgotten check on my bedside table. I share with a friend how spending that amount of money would be such a leap of faith and I then read a blog with the words leap of faith in them. I literally never remember reading those words in print before.
- Several plans go kafluey and I start to get bent out of shape but finally surrender. They later turn out much better than I had initially planned.
- I think to myself I'd like another joy mug and the next day at water aerobics my teacher decides to have us race across the pool and give a prize to the winner, me, a mug with joy written on it.
You get the picture. Surrender use to be a dirty word for me. Now it is the answer to my prayers.
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