Thank you to any of you that sent me energy- it worked!!! (see previous post) I used the energy I gathered to call the school and speak to her tutor. This for me was like walking into a den of lions- I was so scared. Yet I told her the truth, was absolutely vulnerable about my fear, my confusion, my doubt and uncertainty. I told her the proposed work for the summer had not been touched. I told her I did not believe it was in her best interest to do schoolwork this summer when my daughter needed a break from the pressure and what it triggers in her. I had been sending love ahead to the school, tutor and new teacher who is said to be very strict and not so warm and fuzzy. The tutor was so compassionate and understanding. I told her honestly that we would probably leave the school as I could not see my daughter in school 7 hours a day and then doing hours of homework each night and weekends. I said she needs time to recharge. I said how much my two hours a week with my health coach drains me because I feel so incompetent and I could not have her under that kind of pressure day and night. Why do we think it is acceptable to pressure ourselves and others so much? There has to be another way. She proposed something I had never considered- that she could stay in this school without homework. I burst into tears and had to hangup. Why did it move me so much? Because it was the answer to my prayers, because I saw I am not alone, that powerful forces join me in working for the good of all. I saw my faith is justified, I saw the compassion of another person. I felt understood and supported instead of judged as I imagined would happen and has happened so many times before. I cried as a release of tension, I cried for all beings everywhere, especially children who suffer. I cried because I knew without a doubt that vulnerability is my strength and that miracles are daily faire when I join forces with the Divine and surrender without attachment or control. I can not begin to put into words how touched I was and am. Suffice it to say, I feel blessed and touched by magic. May miracles unfold in you lives, my beloveds.
what a powerful post! Thank you for it. My son is starting kindergarden today and I have been having the very same strong feelings. Glad to know that there is a real shift here and I do not stand alone.
ReplyDeleteYour courage to stand for your daughter is tremendous. The revelation that your vulnerability is your strength=POWERFUL BEYOND WORDS.
Leigh
www.aspiritfull.wordpress.com
Leigh, your words come at just the right time. It has been very challenging to know what to do and I am getting little support for my "radical" ideas from acquaintances, even friends. I have felt so alone with this. But my body was screaming a big NO! and I have to listen. All my adult friends with learning differences spent a lot of time in self hatred, actually even throwing up often and I as a parent should force and manipulate my child to fit in to a system that induces this level of self hatred. I just can't do it. I send you oodles of love and support as you begin this school journey. I know your heart will guide you. I send your son love on this auspicious day.
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