Monday, June 2, 2014

still in 3d with doubt replacing disappointment


still experiencing rather heavy weather. i hear mama bird chirping to her babies and hoping i too will be reborn past my current doubt. our shadow sides are being pushed to the forefront. Will you join me in loving the disowned parts of ourselves? I must admit it feels effort-full and useless even though intellectually i know otherwise. I am offering love to the part of me that doubts, that feels this two unfulfilled aspects of my life will never shift, the fears for security. having met so many of my own precious intentions, you'd think i could muster up more faith. not really so much today and that is ok. i am doing my best to love the whole bloody mess. i wish the same for you.
i am blessed to visit a friend in San Francisco area and then see Amma tomorrow. Perhaps things will shift. I saw such a depressing movie yesterday i actually watched another movie to shift the energy and that was rather depressing too. So time to embrace depression, doubt and discouragement. this too shall pass.

a bit later. the good news that i must acknowledge despite my funk is that i am able to resist the urge to blame myself, try to fix myself, judge myself, major progress indeed. and a significant part of me can recognize that this is a major growth spurt and that there will be some goodies on the other side. i must admit i am ready for them to show up in the material world. i must also admit that the inner gifts i have already received truly are the most priceless. gotta be fair here even though i don't feel like it. bah humbug.


  1. *i must admit i am ready for them to show up in the material world.*

    AMEN to that!

    Kisses, Sanna :-)

  2. I am right with you, show me the money!
    much love

  3. Adding my AMEN also. There must be something "in the air." Even good things seem to have the 3 Ds hovering around them lately.

    Hanging in there!

    Love to all of us "in the soup."


  4. thanks B.J., hope you are feeling better. i feel great actually after staring into Amma's eyes. I'll ride the wave while it is up.
    yes, love to all of us, soup and all.

  5. Darlings I was just writing a huge post about my experiences with Amma and everything disappeared. I cannot get into my posts at all. Main think is Amma was a miracle and I had such calm certainty, now back in soup and loving my deep sense of inadequacy in this moment. Also recognizing how my Ds's are smaller now, discouragement instead of despair for example, ah let's hang in there, what else can we do, sigh.

  6. Yes, it is a VERY special time lately, isn´t it?
    I hope to be able to write an article about it soon … I am in the mood to, but there is no flow in writing lately :-( … maybe tomorrow … because the story behind the scene/dust/density is so interesting, beautiful, special :-) …

    Hugs and Kisses, Sanna

    And a very special first-time wave at B.J. :-)

  7. By the way: There is a remote group meditation tomorrow at 11.00 am UTC hold by me (Sanna and friends). The theme is „Live your changes“.
    So many people struggle the changes, so I decided to offer this meditation. For more information please visit my website
    Hugs, Sanna

    *** Savannah, I hope it is ok for you to post this information here. If not please just delete my contribution ***

    1. Darling,
      we are one tribe doing our best. Go for it.