Tuesday, May 29, 2012

flower petals on my head

I had the most delicious, peaceful, loving weekend welcoming my daughter back from her week in Yosemite and connecting with friends old and new. I am coming into a new era of truth telling, sharing my purpose and insights with increasing openness, even to
'strangers." It feels very good.
I decided at the last minute to go to a meeting with the American teacher Gangaji. I heard she was going to be here, looked up her teachings and wondered if I would go. Then a friend wanted to go see her so we did. I was the first to raise my hand to volunteer to speak with her, knowing it was being filmed. I was way in the back and she did not see me. My friends urged me to move closer, as several others did, so she would call on me. I looked inside and saw a new landscape. In the past I would have felt the need to connect to her energy field, to see if she had any answers, to contribute through my willingness to be vulnerable. I checked inside to see if my contribution would be of benefit and I felt silence, no need to do or say anything. The most amazing shift was apparent. I felt no need to GET something from outside of myself. Someone recently shared this story that perfectly summarizes how I felt. The story goes that the disciple goes to study with the Guru, sitting at his feet in awe and gratitude, showering his teacher with rose petals. Until one day this student wakes up and showers her own head with rose petals. When I realized I needed nothing from Gangaji, tears came to my eyes as I imagined myself showered in flower petals.

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