This is another dialogue on thinkwithyourheart.com with Sue's kind permission; trying to zero in on our magical abilities to create now (sorry about the formatting):
"Your job as creator is simply to choose what’s in your heart, and then trust in the universe to do all the legwork to set it up for you. U take the first step in faith, regardless of whether or not u think its possible, and mountains will move to meet ur hearts desire. And things r moving REALLY fast right now."
me: the challenge for me with that is this, I chose what was in my heart, i put it out there, i advertised as i haven’t before, I loved it I devoted time, energy and passion to it. I did it out of joy and kerplok,8O I got one person showing up. So I can either judge myself as a failure or shake my head and say what the heck? Truth is it feels like empty promises.There was probably some unconscious unworthiness in there but shit. So now I brought the lack to consciousness and i feel stuck in a void. I gave the last shot everything I had and landed back in square one. Sot so easy to trust and go again. Now I feel stuck in no man’s land. Flat. REalize in this moment, yea i have big desire but really hard to trust again and keep going. Some areas I trust totally. When I adopted my daughter the government never responded to our visa papers and we were literally in Guatemala without being able to get her a visa. My then husband had wild schemes of snatching her and carrying her across the border etc. My faith was steady as a rock and never wavered. I ended up getting a call from INS at our hotel in Guatemala!! - we’d had the wrong fax number and he’d never gotten our paperwork, the minute he did we got immediate approval. That time stays with me. It is is only in this minute that I am allowing the feeling of sadness to flood me how my last offering fell flat.Feel caught in catch 22.Feel like it is mission impossible, like it is a web. My last offering was so pure, i feel i got the universal screw that it went basically nowhere. Even the one person who showed only came for the first class.bah humbug.yeayea, i know i am shooting myself in the foot here so I will love that. ok that helped me restore my humor
- November 20, 2013 at 11:42 am#11124actually i am pissed, feel like i gave it everything and still some twist i missed so got nowhere eye of the needle indeed. feel too hard to figure this paradox out and get this promised mountain to friggin move
- November 20, 2013 at 2:09 pm#11128Hi there…
I hope I’m not overstepping a boundary here but, I’m hoping that this may help……..Speaking from an experiential point of view, what Lauren said is “Absolutely true”!!!
HOWEVER: It’s been my experience it’s only true when standing firmly in 5D…..From 3D, which you are clearly still working from, in terms of frustration with creation, our only job is to quit playing in 3D, or it doesn’t matter how hard we try to play by the 5D rules…..Nothing will work!Having said that…..I am sooooooo glad it didn’t work for me in 3D because, what I was trying to create from 3D doesn’t begin to compare to what I’m creating in 5D….In terms of bringing me true fulfillment!For Instance: When I was “trying” to make money (3D)…it never worked but, when I was simply enjoying myself playing in the energy of having already created it (5D), the universe supported me every step of the way! And, as far as what I wanted to create, in terms of sharing with the world…..When I finally surrendered, and simply lived in the joy of knowing that the universe would bring me that which would match the joy that I was putting out…..I got cancer! Now from a 3D perspective, that’s not something to be joyful about but…. from 5D, you gain a whole new perspective!FOR INSTANCE:
When I was first diagnosed it threw me off because, that wasn’t at all what I was creating and at the time, despite going thru the ascension process, I was still able to sustain a pretty high level of joy so, manifesting cancer wasn’t something that I would have ever expected. However, when I was in the process of deciding what my options were……To have the tumor surgically removed, along with supportive treatment, which “they” say would have gotten this all over and done with quite quickly…..The reason I chose not to take that options is because, taking safe path seemed to service no purpose and, as I brought each of my options into my heart, it was the option, not have surgery or any other treatment, that filled my heart with joy! And, as I sat in this joy, I saw the magnificent “opportunity” that I was being given to cure cancer! While everyone around me was telling me that I was signing my own death sentence in making that decision, I knew in my heart that this option would bring me the greatest joy and fulfillment…I was being gifted with an opportunity to be an example to others of our power of “choice”, even when dealing with life and death! And, I knew that it was because of my hard work, not despite it, that was allowing me to share such a beautiful gift with the world!So, just know that the universe is conspiring to bring us our greatest joy and fulfillment, which we have earned!!!! And, while you’re finishing up your 3D stuff, you might want to just practice playing! Using Lauren’s technique but, not being attached to any outcomes. Just “Feel” whatever it is that you want to feel more of, in whatever way that looks to you, feeling/knowing that you “already” have it….and you’ll find yourself supported! Playing will lift your vibration out of the energy of “trying to figure it all out” which only pulls you down and keeps you on that hamster wheel…..Playing in the feeling of what it would be like to get exactly what I wanted, eventually brought me just that, in terms of finances, but in other areas it was greater than my 3D mind could have ever conceived!So, you might want to let go of the “It never works for me” because, what never works in 3D does work in 5D, and if you just practice playing with that energy, you’ll create all the supportive energy you need for a more joyful transition!Hope that brings you a little relief??? Much love & support, Sue
Me: Sue, What an inspiration!!! OMG am I impressed; getting cancer and not letting that stop or dissuade you, now that is P O W E R and sovereignty. I had my little shit fit driving to yoga and it lasted about 10 minutes. It was lovely and I truly enjoyed it, and totally loved myself through it. While in yoga (kundalini which rocks) here’s what came through; more of my catholic guilt trip. .I felt like I had kept my vibration up, loved myself, dropped judgment, dropped most of my attachment, shifted my focus, cleared tons of dross, learned to be neutral most of the time, suffered through endless sleepless nights, dove to the depths of my agony and still i was caught in my own web and i projected it on to the universe ( and why not through in the Pope while i was at it ; actually the new Pope gives me hope). I was royally pissed off and it was a fire that cleared itself away.So I saw myself as a limited self trying so hard to win “god’s” approval so he’d give me a break, that was the energy. This poem had helped me shift this before especially the first partWild GeeseYou do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.saw it was more 3D coming forward. I get pissed when I hear it is so easy and all i have to do is leap in faith and it still splatters in my face. you nailed it Sue thank you. From 3D the wheels of the bus just go round and round. So get to enjoy more dissolution it least it is sooo much quicker, now that I can get behind. plus my sense of humor was restored quickly but I still don’t like this 3D stuff and want a magic fairy to just blow it away. So loving you Sue for you inspiration. You are an angel.
Here’s the rest of the poem if anyone is interested.Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.from Dream Work by Mary Oliver- November 20, 2013 at 2:25 pm
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