forgiveness, again and "them"

I had a small yet powerful experience the other day. I wanted some lunch so went to my local co-op. Turns out I was early and they were still serving breakfast at the food bar. The only lunchy type food was soup. The one I wanted had no spoon so I borrowed the spoon from another soup and served myself. A man came out with more serving spoons and I told him what I'd done. He became unglued and yelled at me, "Don't do that!" He explained I'd mixed up vegetarian and non vegetarian soups and that the soups weren't ready. I felt a mild charge in my body yet stayed neutral. Now the first miracle is that the charge in my body was very mild, the second that I could stay neutral. I said evenly,"Sorry, I wasn't thinking." He immediately calmed down too and explained why it was important. What could have escalated into something unpleasant actually turned out to be a gentle exchange. Now this for me is true forgiveness. I did not make him wrong, saw no "error" in my "brother" and we were both able to go on our way. For me forgiveness has been to slowly retrain my nervous system not to perceive attack. If it does perceive attack, I often can override it with my powerful intent to stay neutral. I notice every time I counter attack, I suffer. Every time I stay neutral I remain at peace. Duh, which do I prefer.

I have an official announcement to make. It appears I am channeling a group I call "them." I have been receiving messages since 2005/2006 usually to tell someone something or to do something for someone.  I never gave it too much attention. I sort of played it down within myself. My new dear friend Hein suggested to me yesterday basically to own "them." I recognized I never thought of it as channeling as I don't hear anything I just KNOW. Now I don't have a clue if this is a group of aspects of my Higher Self or energies from elsewhere. I just know that when I relay their messages people often burst into tears or have some revelation. I am speaking about it here to get over myself and own this. I sense some unworthiness, as though to admit this would be some form of grandiosity. I am getting more and more clear about how we are unlimited, powerful beyond imagination. As Marianne Williamson has said, who are we NOT to own our own magnificence. We short change ourselves and the Universe when we play small. I feel fluttering in my tummy when I write this. Too bad, I'm coming out of the closet.
I had an unique experience when I listened to them the other day. Someone I have connected with on ThinkwithYourHeart.org was having a meltdown while at work in a skyscraper in Seattle. This was happening in the moment. I got this urge from "them" to light a candle, go barefoot out on to my land, recognize the sacredness of this land and all life and call out her name. She, Jenn, had said something about looking out the window at the clouds to help calm down. So I told her I'd send her a friendly cloud to support her. I wrote to her that I would do this and proceeded to get a bunch of thorns in my feet as I hopped out on to the land. I called Jenn's name nine times. I truly experienced how sacred Gaia is, how blessed I am to be the steward of this hallowed land, how vast my connection to Jenn felt in that moment. She got my email hours after the fact. She said she was stunned because she suddenly started saying to a co-worker that she was feeling much better, she did not understand but her energy changed rapidly apparently at the same time as my ritual. She also had the urge to take a picture of the cloud outside her window- all this BEFORE she received my email. I ask you, is something up? I tell you for sure, we're not in Kansas anymore. (For you readers from other countries, this is a reference to a famous line from an American classic movie, The Wizard of Oz.")

Our Deepest Fear

by Marianne Williamsonfrom A Return To Love: Reflections on the Principles of A Course in Miracles

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”