Thursday, April 26, 2012

holy relationship

O.K., this is another one that is very hard for me to put into words yet I’m going to give it the good old college try. My mother-in-law (out-law) asked me to tell her what a holy relationship is after I told her I was at a day long intensive immersing myself in this Truth. (I just changed type face and some how it gives the whole thing a more regal look, don’t you think?)
So what is holy relationship? I sure have a lot of experience of what it is not. But I digress. For me holy relationship is a felt sense of unity, of Love, of a heart connection that can take the breath away. It is based on one foundation- the awareness of our own wholeness. That knowing of wholeness is based on one reality- our permanent, irreversible connection with Source, with God. Once we begin to embody, to live from a place of knowing this as our lived reality, our life will never be the same.I often cry lately. I cry sometimes when I act outside of the bounds of holy relationship as the distance between Who I am and how I am acting is so painful. Yet more often I cry because I am in alignment with that knowing and then my heart is filled with an immense gratitude. So what does that feel like to align with that place? I literally feel as though my heart is expanding. Lately I often bend over backwards, literally, and I just realized that it is though my heart is being let out of prison. A tightness that kept me physically collapsed around my heart, scrunched over with shoulders hunched in protective mode, is being released. When I am in holy relationship, tears often come to my eyes. The way I describe it to myself is, I’m home, after a  long and arduous journey, after eons in the wilderness, in the desert. I have come back to mySelf and boy does it feel GOOOOOODD! The sense of homecoming is a warmth that permeates my body. Everything feels right, shiny and true. Colors literally are more vivid, as though light emanates from everything I see. Everyone I meet is my Beloved. I feel a deep sense of unity and compassion. 
Here is one example. I was at my food co-op and I saw a man playing music outside. He started talking to me and told me he had to go to jail. He is homeless and a street musician. He averages $12 a day from his music. A shop owner called the police and he was given a fine of over $3000 which he can not pay so off to jail he must go. He said when he finally falls asleep, the police come along and kick him. I felt such tenderness and compassion as I listened. Yes, I did give him some money but what felt better was the long hug and intense gaze into his eyes. There was no separation between us in that moment. His story was my story, a story from which I could not look away as I might have in the past.
This is just a taste of what holy relationship is for me. Yet my fingers are cold as I sit outside on this cloudy rainy day and tutoring is over soon. I hope this will intrigue and you will begin to notice holy instants of unity in your day. Nothing to me is more delicious!! Thank you Mutti for the question.

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